"We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give." -Sir Winston Churchill

Hot and sunburned, but thrilled that I helped build this house!

I need to refer back to my 30 x 30 list, which is the whole basis of this blog. 'Volunteer Regularly' is on there as one of my goals. Recently someone told me that they had "grown out of serving others and now focus more on serving myself." I was floored. I focus so much of my time on service to others in any capacity that I was kind of offended at this person's comment. Additionally, to say that you 'grow out of' serving others is a completely ridculous remark to me. It's not a stage of life, like potty training or your "party phase." How can you not help others? How can you be so self-absorbed that you wouldn't look around and see someone that needs help? They are everywhere, I assure you. Or worse, look around, acknowledge that there is someone that needs your help and then completely ignore it? Selllllfish. So, I'm going to make this a short and sweet entry about why volunteering and service to others isn't really hard or a huge time commitment.

Common Gripe #1: "But I don't have enough time!!"  I volunteer during the school year at a local elementary school and I read with a 9 year old girl. We meet every week for 1 hour. ONE HOUR. That's IT! Every week the little girl and I talked about different things and little by little, her reading improved and a friendship formed. By the end of the school year she was clinging to me begging me to come back in the fall. Of course I will, but that meant a lot. How did I get into that? I went to the United Way website and looked for volunteer opportunities. There are so many options as far as how much time you want to commit and what you'd like to do. If you don't like kids, that's cool, there are nursing homes, animal shelters, even picking up trash in a neighborhood! Friends, pick a hobby of yours and find a volunteer opportunity that matches it.

Common Gripe #2: "I can't get away from work and my weekends are too packed!" I told my boss that I have this commitment during my job interview and she was thrilled to let me go. Not only that, but she didn't want me to use that time as lunch! She wanted me to volunteer and THEN go to lunch. If you don't have a boss that is willing to let you go out into the community and do some good and be a positive representation of your organization, then your boss sucks and you need to look for a new job. If you absolutely can't steal away from "The Man" then carve out some time in your selfishly busy weekend and do something. Even if it's just once a month!

There are also civic groups to join and get involved with service. Kiwanis is a good one. Many Young Professional organizations have a big focus on service. I'm going to my first Young Variety event this weekend. It's like the Variety Club, but for people in their 20s and 30s and we only work with children's organizations such as Special Olympics or Boys and Girls Club. I think I'm going to be tasked with building bicycles on Saturday, so say a prayer for the poor kids that will be pedalin' around on my handiwork!

Me with some of the best Habitat-ers ever in a neighborhood I helped build!

Common Gripe #3: "I don't feel like I'm making a difference!" I can see how shoveling food on trays in a soup kitchen can be tedious and you don't really see that what you're doing is making a difference. The 'squeaky wheels' are always going to gripe about something with a sense of entitlement, but take a look around that kitchen and find a few kids that are gobbling up that food. Or a young mom. Or an elderly person. Look around for the good. Now, if you want an opportunity where you get more bang for your proverbial buck, I suggest Habitat for Humanity. I must say I'm a little bias, but after one day working on a house, you can see that you put together the wall framing and raised all four walls, maybe some interior walls, whatever. You can SEE the difference that you made. You can talk to the family that will be living in the home because they are required to work side by side with the volunteers on something called "sweat equity" in lieu of a down payment. You can see for yourself how grateful they are and twenty years down the road, you can drive past that house and say, look at that. I helped build someone's home. It's the most gratifying feeling in the world.

When you help others and you see the impact that's made on their life, you tend to be a happier person. Your quality of life increases. Be happy and live up to ol' Churchill's quote: We make a living by what we get, we make a life by what we give."

Asheville lovin'

Once upon a time there was a magical place surrounded by mountains. The air was fresh, the people were friendly and it was small enough so there wasn't over crowding or even rush hour. Around every corner was something new, even if you'd been to that same corner a hundred times. People there cared about the environment, voiced their opinions freely with no judgement from others and music was all around. The city was a wonderful, eclectic place with so much to offer...including the title of Beer City.

Friends, as you know I lived in Asheville, NC for a year while working with Habitat for Humanity. I feel like I should follow up my Iowa blog with a tiny blog about my other home, Asheville, NC. You see, I'm an Iowa girl through and through and to be honest, I'd grown up with a vaguely low opinion of the south. But a very dear friend, Ms. Erica Shanks, told me about this job and by the grace of God I took it! I was scared and lonely for a long time once I moved out there, but it became home to me and it now has a huge chunk of my heart. Have you ever fallen in love with a city? I lived in Kansas City for a year and a half and although it was great because I had friends there and it was relatively close to home, I never felt like it was home. Asheville is a laid-back, homey town that I love like crazy!

Katee and me at Sliding Rock

In the picture, you'll see me at Sliding Rock when my friend Katee came to visit from KC. Yes friends, it's a HUGE rock that people slide down and into a deep pool of water. All natural. On that trip, we also went to a waterfall and swam in clear, cool, drinkable mountain water. On any given day you can find hiking, biking, swimming, camping, SOMETHING to do.

That same weekend, we sat on a patio at a bar downtown and we saw a bagpiper, a travelling frisbee golf game and people dancing in a window above us. You just never know what you're going to run into when you're there. For a town of 70,000, it's pretty diverse. There is a drum circle downtown ever Friday night. Nearby, there are street performers which includes a girl that twirls around hula hoops that light up.

Cassi, Jennie, Gigi and me.

I also met a few close friends there. Gigi is a crazy Argentinian that came up to me while I was working and straight up asked me, "Do you wanna be my friend?" What do you say?! I felt like a kid on the playground. Yes, we became friends and she introduced me to Cassi and Jennie. Kelli was introduced to me by Jennie and she was the final addition to my group in Asheville. Kelli actually let me live with her for two weeks while I was in transition! We created Champagne Wednesdays and sat outside and talked for hours. These girls became "my girls" and we all hung out and became a little family.

Kelli and me!

Asheville was a lots of "firsts" for me too.... first road race, first mountain top hike, first fundrasing event that I organized, first time trying tofu bacon, first true vintage shop purchases, the list could go on forever. I guess part of me loves it so much because I grew as a person so much in Asheville. I feel like I'm a lot less judgemental, more accepting and also more laid back. I have my freak-out moments like everyone else, but I mellowed a lot after my time in Asheville! My friend Katee described Asheville as a "Utopia" and that's a perfect word for a place that I'd leave my heart. Love Iowa. Love Asheville. Totally different and totally awesome!

Good ol' Iowayy

Anyone who knows me well knows that I'm a big fan of my home state, Iowa. I brought some friends to Iowa when I was in college and the whole weekend kept telling them cool things about what they were seeing. They tease me mercilessly to this day about me being a tour guide. Well, I think you should know a little bit about where you are visiting or living-- it gives you a sense of ownership and enhances the whole experience. A friend of mine finally said, "For everything that Iowa is not, the people from there are so proud of their home state. It's ridiculous." First of all, there are only a FEW things that Iowa is not, like known for its mountain views and fantastic skiing. The part about Iowans being proud of their state made me begin to notice the reactions of Iowans when you talk about their state.

First, it should be said that we aren't crazy, corn-loving wackos. We are also not like the residents of some southern states who reinact Civil War Battles and obsess over the history rather than the future.

So, to better educate you on the goodness of Iowa, I've listed a few things to ponder:

1. Let's start simple...open up your pantry. A lot of what you see is from Iowa. Quaker Oats, Tones Spices and Blue Bunny Ice Cream are all based here. Maytag used to be based here and Winnebago is based here. President Eisenhower said, "Iowa can survive without the united States, but the United States cannot survive without Iowa."

2. The famous people that are from Iowa or have Iowa connections is pretty amazing. Mamie Dowd Eisenhower (Yep, Dwight D.'s wife), Bob Feller, Kurt Warner, Donna Reed, Ann Landers and Dear Abby, John Wayne, Glenn Miller, Meredith Willson (who wrote "The Music Man," Ashton Kutcher, Elijah Wood, William Frawley (Fred from 'I Love Lucy') and President Herbert Hoover are from Iowa. Gene Wilder, yes Willy Wonka, went to the University of Iowa and George Washington Carver went to Iowa State. If you don't know who some of those people are, I suggest you read up on them. They are all very influential in areas of politics, entertainment and sports.  

3. College Athletics. Friends, most people would say that Iowa isn't great because we don't have a professional sports team. I beg to differ. Yes, it's true that we don't have the professional athletics that other states do. We have college football and some minor league stuff. But, the Iowa vs. Iowa State game is epic every year. The rivalry is year round and state-wide. However, should you leave the state and you happen to see someone wearing ISU or Iowa gear, you want to hug them regardless of your preference. You feel more connected to them like they are a part of your extended family. In fact, there's a chance you have mutaul friends. I actually have a story about this: I was in California for my internship in the summer of 2007 and I was trying to navigate the public transporation system there. On the train deck on my first day of work, I look over and there wa an older gentleman with an Iowa shirt on. I immediately felt comfortable asking him if I was in the right place for this train. We got to talking and his daughter went to my college! Crazy small world! Who needs pro ball when you have your Hawkeye or Cyclone family?

4. Family Values. I've done a lot of travelling. Not as much as some, but more than most. My dad was in the Army and lived all over the country and in parts of Europe. I love to travel but there is something really wonderful about coming to the Midwest. It's offensive when people don't wave after you've let them in to traffic. We say smile and say hello to random people we pass. We. Are. Polite. My brother is in the Marine Corps and has really travelled all over. He will most likely never be a resident of the Midwest again but every time he returns for a visit, he is floored by how nice everyone is. It's true-- we're the nicest people ever.

5. We don't have much by way of tourism, but the Iowa State Fair is pretty stinking fun. As hoaky as it seems, could YOU carve a cow out of butter? No. There is food that will probably give you Type 2 Diabetes if over-consumed, big name artists, rednecks and country folk, drinking, dancing and hogs. Typing this it all sounds very back woods, but remember that it's the BIGGEST state fair in the country. I grew up thinking they were all that large and then I went to Missouri's. What a sad, sad comparison. A musical has been written about us, State Fair, and media from all over the country cover the Fair every. Not so redneck anymore, eh? Our state fair is better than your state fair (neener neener neeeeennnerrrrr)

6. Computers-- In the 1930s, a very early version of the computer was developed at what was then Iowa State College. COMPUTERS! What would you do today without one? You certainly wouldn't be reading this gem of a blog without one. You can thank Iowans for that.

7. John Tinker vs. Des Moines School Board-- In the 60s, some Des Moines high school students were banned from wearing arm bands to school in protest of the Vietnam war. It moved to the Supreme Court and was determined Freedom of Speech. Little known fact: John Tinker went to my high school. Woot! I imagine Lady Gaga wouldn't be wearing the crap she does (sorry, ART) had a decision like this had not been made. Now, between then and now, I'm sure SOMETHING would have come up, but Iowa made it's mark on history.

8. Grant Wood- You know that famous portrait of the farmer with his with and a pitchfork in from of their farmhouse? That artist is Grant Wood... Iowan. His work depicts classic Iowa history. Check it out... http://www.grantwoodartgallery.org/

9. Des Moines is not boring. One of the biggest arguments for Des Moines (and I hear it ALL the time) is that Des Moines is boring and there's nothing to do. On the contrary, we have live shows almost every week, theater, art galleries, the Science Center, a baseball, basketball, arena football, hockey AND a roller derby team, bar districts, a few large shopping areas and parks galore. I like to say we have everything a bigger city, like KC or Chicago has, just on a smaller, better level. Small town feel. I love it.

10. Living Hisotry Farms... this is awesome. It's a lliving museum of three farms in Iowa's history. People there work the land, churn butter, etc. There's a little town with stores and people working there too, all in period costume. Their education and entertainment efforts are like none I've ever seen anywhere else. Very cool! http://www.lhf.org/

Check it out for yourself if you don't believe me-- Iowa's a great place. :)

Goooooaaallll!!!!

I haven't blogged in a few days (ok, ok-- it's been about a week) and in that time, I've done some thinking. I must warn you that the following may be explained in a roundabout, at times confusing way, but here goes.

Folks, goals are important. I find myself charged up and motivated when I'm around someone that has high standards for themselves and is always thinking of the future. It's an attractive quality in a person. I hung out with an old friend from high school last night. He is 26 and has 2 degrees. One is in finance or economics--something that makes my head hurt-- and the other is nursing. He didn't particularly think about nursing or have a desire to do it, but he was in a few car accidents in a short time and decided that life is too short -- so he wanted to help people. There are lots of ways to help people that won't bury you in debt, but go big or go home, right? In the next few years, he's thinking of going to the military to go through Officer Candidate School. 

Anyway, while talking to him and catching up on each other's lives in the last (ahem) 10 years, I realized that goal oriented people are just plain awesome. It was like night and day talking to him and talking to the last guy I dated. They both had goals, but the last guy's goals were vague... not as concrete.Therefore, easier to slack on. It reminds me of a PR class I took in college. We talked about strategies and tactics and we were supposed to list a task, or a goal in this case, and then ways to accomplish that goal. It's just like life! You want to lose 20 pounds? Ok, great goal-- but don't stop there-- HOW are you going to do that!? Something to ponder since a lot of people get very frustrated when the Goal Gods don't magically smile down on them and their desires aren't fulfilled. "I can't understand why I haven't lost weight!" Well, more 'cheat' days than healthy days certainly didn't help. Heeeerrre's your sign.

Also, the other thing I've been thinking a lot about is a person's character. I often wish life was like that movie, Shallow Hal, where Jack Black's character could only see a person for who they are and not what they look like. Wouldn't that be wonderful!? You meet someone, in a friend situation, dating, whatever, and then there's a falling out of some sort. When things get hard, are they there for you? Did they REALLY care about you to begin with if they aren't there for you now? Admittedly, I am not a person to generally stay in touch or even talk to my ex boyfriends. There is one though that is a great friend. In fact just a few short weeks after we broke up (and THAT wasn't pretty) my Grandma died. He was there for me and has been there for me several times since then. That's not just for the bad things, but the good things too. He WANTS me to be happy in whatever I do. Just because things don't work out the way you envision them, doesn't mean that you are at a loss. You could gain a lot too. God's plans are crazy awesome.

But back to the real point-- if a person cares for you and then isn't there for you for whatever reason, it leads you believe that they only did nice things for you in the first place because they somehow benefitted from it. Lame. People sometimes really REALLY suck. But, then again, most people are pretty great. You have to weed out those crappy people of poor character from your life and stop trying to hang on to what you THOUGHT you wanted with them. Surround yourself with people that you respect and want to be like and half similar goals. Let all the other stuff go. Move on. Be a better person because of it.